Saturday, October 29, 2011







Friday, October 28, 2011

Growing up all the same differently.

Sometimes, I ask myself in complete wonder, how late am I compared to the world.

People grow up together until college. It's the same classes, the same environment, the same leaders, the same food, the same teachers and the same lifestyle. There is a collective growing up in our own little worlds. All different, but all the same.

We start together but we finish differently.

And when we step out of school, our lives take different speeds. Some make smarter decisions. We exchanged stories over a casual cup of coffee and there it starts, where did I go differently?

A person my age should already be what exactly?

I plan my own way around the world based on what my friends have made of their lives. It's the most convenient way to plan a life. I make investments. I plan funds. I save and spend. We all do. But we all do it differently.

Everyone stopped growing up the same way after college. And it's scary to see myself pitted against my peers. I am both comfortable and secure that I'm not in the bottom percentile but it's a sad sad world to grow up alone in.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

The sky is blue.

I remember moments in my life when all I can see is that one person and no one else.
And I've had four of those moments.

It started with that one afternoon just outside the library. The log-in sheet sat quietly in front of this boy, his hand on a pen, writing down his name. The hall was quiet with just the two of us. And as I stood beside him watching, he lifted his eyes to mine and that was the first moment.

A few years later, I grew up a little and joined volunteer organizations. It was in one of those orientations. The room was silent as the meeting progressed, student leaders stood one by one to introduce themselves. And then there he was, standing alone in a small sea of heads. He wasn't very tall and he wasn't the most handsome of men, but he had that fondness from my heart. And I never forgot my second moment.

A year passed by and I'm in another place full of people, and just as I stand in front of a crowd of student leaders, across the room there was this boy, in his work suit - quiet, smiling and it was as if everything nice in the world was following him. He was infectious. This was the third moment.

And two more years followed. It was a sunny morning and I had had my breakfast. I was in front of the bin when I heard footsteps going up to where I was. I turn around and there was this beautiful person in front of me. No smiles, no warmth, just that beauty. And it was enough to make my heart do flipflops. My knees buckled and my heart melted to the floor. My fourth moment.

Everytime I remember things like these, music plays in my head.
And I always think, so this is love at first sight.