Wednesday, November 16, 2011

I grew up thinking I was generally without much money.
It's hard to ask for things for me. I feel unnerved and vulnerable. I don't know if other people feel the same way.

Monday, November 14, 2011

Christmas Is When

There are things that grow on us over time and it gives meaning to our little holidays.
And in the spirit of Christmas, here is my Merry Christmas List.

1. Going broke for Adelina's Ham. It's not Christmas without ham.
2. Hearing All I Want For Christmas by Mariah over and over again on the radio. You'd think it'd get old, but it never does.
3. Serendipitously flipping the channel to Love Actually on December day. And you still watch it.
4. Getting excited to go watch Bukas Palad sing before the Misa de Gallo mass at the Gesu.
5. I get that P5,000.00 Market Market GC and plan what to do with it.

Friday, November 4, 2011

Past me

Me and My Family
September 29
first thing i looked for.. does it smell like japan? it does. it is japan (isip ko syempre, wow..i'm back! and it smells like the same japan i have in my auditory memory.yikee!) after passing the immigration counter and getting our luggage, we rode the limousine bus to Shinjuku Ward (imagine PhP1,200 per head for a bus ride for 2 hours just to get to the city?! why is the airport so far away in the first place?!). After getting off the bus, we got a taxi and went straight to my mansion (fyi.. condo`s are called mansions in japan. it's not an apartment pala. thank goodness. :P). we had dinner at the most expensive Sushi place i've ever eaten.. and to think i've eaten a lot of sushi in my lifetime (it's so expensive that my dad paid PhP11, 200.00 just to feed 6 people. that's double our usual budget per head. sheps.). anyway, we all went to the hotel at Shinagawa (40minutes away from my place). and later, my mom, my sister and i went to the mansion to sleep there.
September 30
we woke up and find out we had no heater. and it was the end of getting a shower at the mansion. the three of us went to the hotel to shower. haha :P i picked out a shirt before i left for japan, and i was so happy i got to wear it (dense. pero i really did want to wear something special :P). we had lunch at one of the top floors of the hotel.. and then karaoke! my dad got super drunk that he had to go sleep at 5 in the afternoon. goodness. my closest (in degree) relatives were there - the remaining brother and sisters of my dad. so it was a tearful moment for them since 3 passed away already (family thing na so..). my mom, my sister and i went to akihabara to get home supplies but eventually ended up back in shinjuku. my mom parted ways with us to go to the hotel (and tend to my dad).. so it was just me and my sister.. alone at the mansion. yikee. :P we went to Don Quijote (a super mega discount store) that night with Mr. Ando (my dad's friend, and owner of the building i'm staying at.). this day was the first time this year that i wasn't able to go to mass. hay. *sighs*
October 01
no heater still. my sister and i went to shinagawa for showers. and lucky us, the immigration people stationed at Shinagawa train station spotted us (buti na lang nangyari na sa amin to 3 years ago, so we just have to show them our passports and ok na). but woe to me, i left it with my mom.. haha so i talked my way out of the mess. who knew i could do that. :P when we all met up, my dad had business at Yokohama and the three of us left for shopping. we went to discount stores.. otherwise, i don't even want to think about the figure we'd spend. dinner was at the hotel again, with my aunt Kimie (she has a pretty name.she's the oldest living relative now. 77 and still strong!). since my sister had school duties to attend to, i went home alone. first time i spend alone at the mansion, and i've been alone ever since. (charing! :P)
October 02
today was simple, i went to school with Papa to meet up with the sensei who's been helping me. my mom waited for a Tokyo Gas representative to fix the heater. we went to Don Quijote again. My mom and sister left. I bought my ref and oven range. and i saw 6 brand new BMW's in a haul-truck that morning (tama ba?) and 14 brand new  Toyota sedans in two haul-trucks that night (panalo talaga yun T-T).
October 03
placement day has arrived. this is the day i should have been studying for. I didn't want to be placed in the beginner-beginner class. that would have been torture. so they sent me to room 301 to wait for the briefing. i waited for 1.5 hours.. no one came. haha and i saw everyone was already leaving. what happened? they assigned me to the wrong room. haha mistakes happen in japan too. anyway, the actual exam starts after lunch so they made everyone come back in the afternoon. and again, i was assigned to the wrong room (pero  exagge na kung 1.5 hours ulit akong nakatunganga ha.). i asked a personnel and he directed me to the interview section.  i talked my way through, and luckily enough.. he told me i didn't have to take the test! (seryosong relieved talaga ako. as in gusto ko maiyak sa galak na hindi magdudugo utak ko nung hapong yun. as in.. inulit ko pa kung pwede na ko umalis.. sabi niya oo. T-T). i went straight for the hotel afterwards. we all went for yakiniku that night.. it's something we share in the family.. (halos every other week na lang ata nag-yayakiniku kami. we love meat..? haha :P) and i left knowing that this is the last time i'm having dinner with them. that night, i got 7 hugs from papa. *heart skipping..* enough said.
October 04
and so, my family was set to leave for the Philippines today. my classes were fortunately scheduled for the afternoon.. so i was able to get to the hotel with 3 hours to spend with my family before they leave for the airport. we had Nagasaki (papa's hometown) food - Champon and Sara Udon. :P (memorable yung laki ng serving nila. haha). we went back to the hotel and i gave last minutes requests to my sister. my time was up so i had to leave without a proper hug from my dad. huhu. but seriously, i computed the arrival of the next train. had i even left 1 minute later, i'd be late for 5 minutes.. and on the first day.

so that's my trip with my family.

later that day.. i had my first Japanese-style mcdo haha. never mind. at school, i was reassigned to the wrong class again. haha i was assigned to the wrong room. again. (kaya pala parang hirap ako sa lesson..? first time nangyari na hirap ako sa japanese class. sheps. at least when they reassigned me, i knew i belonged there because the class curriculum design picked up where JSP 103 ended.). and surprise, the guy who interviewed me was my adviser. small world. :P

alone in japan adventures next. :P

Me.. Alone
October 05
-first itinerary: laundry. haha wala ng masuot eh. :P
-i tried walking to Sasazuka station, a station closer to school (cut costs by PhP5.00 and sight-seeing. nice town. :)) walked home that way too. i got lost tying to find the station though. haha
-first time i called from a payphone.. shucks.
-im sick pala. bought vitamin c capsules for 400 bucks. sheps. should bring meds from philippines next time.
-studied kanji for 2 hours. (soooooo very much behind. i have to cram this..arg. we're on kanji number 104, so that 104 additional kanji characters i have to learn in a week! gosh. bakit ko ba minani-mani yung JSP classes.)
October 06: My first weekend alone
-folded the strips of papers from my care package! i open one everyday. thank you marj, queenie, eswhy, ge and joanini. you make my day, everyday.
-waited for my nimostu.. 3 boxes.. will be shelved the same day to proper designated areas haha
-bought 5-tier shelf.. dami kong gamit ;P
-yakiniku with ando-san and yokota-san (probably my last, for a long time..)
October 07
-church! all i can say is.. wow. Yotsuya's St. Ignatius Church.. amazing. guffaw. really. it's my new cellphone background.
-i brought flowers for Mary. ;) pretty. i pass by a flower stand everyday. (nangangati lang din akong bumili. tagal na kong di nakahawak ng bulaklak.. march pa nun.)
-akihabara.. pc spotting. laptop's are far more cheaper than pc's here. you can get a core2duo 2gRam vista 160gb pc for 70k.. naman.
-muscle girl (nagset-up ng pc table and shelf eh.)
October 08
-national holiday - commemoration for sports day (or something like that..)
-i went for an authentic japanese ramen. last one i ate was 3 years ago.
-i bought dalandan for my cold. my effective remedy. i never liked meds.
-self-building a shelf day again. (sheps.. muscle ba yun..)
-everything's complete in the house.. i can live without leaving, except for food and laundry (and school. :P) and its so clean. haha
- went out the other side of the train station and came a cross an empty children's playground. hmm. sad. but there are kids here. really.
October 09
-opening ceremony
-i went park-hunting. i appreciate the parks we have at our village now. the park i saw was redesigned with apartment buildings.
-i finally found citibank. took me 2 hours. kept ending up in the wrong side of the street. there was a drizzle of rain today.
-i had an express train pass in front of me. it was amazing... except for the part where i was just a meter away from the tracks. that part.. i'll never do again.
October 10
-i started eating cereal for breakfast today instead of going hungry (from katamaran. :P sorry marj, mukhang di uso talaga oatmeal dito.)
-applied for an alien registration card and health insurance at Suginami Ward City Hall.
-i chanced upon taking a different train to school today. same difference.
-ordered my grade 3 to grade 6 kanji books for reference. really really helpful.really.
-so cold. this is the first night i felt really really cold here. i sauna-ed my room with boiling water and i put on a sweater. it was that cold. 
-studied kanji for 2 hours again..

October 11
-i did yoga today. hmm. should review this. i think im doing it wrong..
-first time i used my Pasmo Card. (pasmo card are reloadable train passes with rfid technology, i think.. :))
-nag-mcdo ulit. haha ;P
-i got lost in shinjuku.. i was looking for a bookstore.. probably the only good bookstore within a 5km range..
-i went to Yodobashi Camera and asked about getting a DSL line. it takes a month to set-up. (naman!)
-i bought books today. haha kanji dictionary! (kinacareer?)
-i got my student ID today.. student number L07-C020. there.. i have a record here.
-study kanji for 2 hours again..

October 12
-internetttt! 1st time i was able to succesfully find a cheap enough internet shop! its's PhP400 for 3 hours. goodness. hay. and they have a manga library here.. amazingly enough.. you can browse through it while waiting for a pc booth. did i mention tambak na ko sa email and mga comments na gustong gawin sa multiply?!
-my birthday treat is finally up. more posts to do..
-1st time to use the internet at school too. maximum of 30 minutes per student. erm.
-it was super sunny today.. to the point of almost swearing off my trusted long sleeves. i will need this in the next few weeks. so never mind. it was just hot.
-mcdo. ulit.

October 13
-akihabara- dell real site
-saw an entire building dedicated to gamers
- went perfume shopping
-bought my long time love affair with kenzo - leau par pour femme
snoopy game
saw a guy in a pikachu costume
laptops are cheaper than desktops here
-pasta isnt their strong suit
-painted my nails

harajku snoopy town
bought a book, keychain and socks
authentic soba
takeshita street
got my name stamp
new houseguest - snoopy
October 15

October 16

so, in short.. what i've been doing is..
There are people like me who spend so much time in organizing our lives. It starts with simple things. That big heavy bag we carry to school everyday in grade school. That notebook where we scribble down absolutely everything the teacher writes on the board. That first cellphone where everyone that belongs to a certain group should stay together on our address book.

It doesn't really change. It's still groups, cliques and crews on our yahoo messenger and facebook friends. Let's admit liking organization.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

A little like birthdays.

There was always this me who sat back and watched the world, not really waiting for love to happen; but it did. That ended.

And for a little more than four years I've been running.

There were times when it was really hard. But I never really did anything. I just stood watch.

I recently found out he was married, it was the first time in my life I understood why people go to drink when something bad happens.

It's not just because they want to, or they'd like to waste away the rest of their lives into the bliss of alcohol. Maybe there's something else.

Drinking with friends gives us the chance to create a rite of passage. It's the same reason why we hold birthdays, and anniversaries, and Christmas parties. We're people, we're accustomed to culture and ceremonies. We like our little rituals. It's our internal joys or in my case, torments, realized into action.

Now he's happy, and in another parallel universe I would have been invited to his wedding. I'd bet my life on it.

We feel, we put into reality, and then we move on.

happy birthday to me.