A little like birthdays.

There was always this me who sat back and watched the world, not really waiting for love to happen; but it did. That ended.

And for a little more than four years I've been running.

There were times when it was really hard. But I never really did anything. I just stood watch.

I recently found out he was married, it was the first time in my life I understood why people go to drink when something bad happens.

It's not just because they want to, or they'd like to waste away the rest of their lives into the bliss of alcohol. Maybe there's something else.

Drinking with friends gives us the chance to create a rite of passage. It's the same reason why we hold birthdays, and anniversaries, and Christmas parties. We're people, we're accustomed to culture and ceremonies. We like our little rituals. It's our internal joys or in my case, torments, realized into action.

Now he's happy, and in another parallel universe I would have been invited to his wedding. I'd bet my life on it.

We feel, we put into reality, and then we move on.

happy birthday to me.